5 Back-to-School Traditions
The back-to-school sales are here! Time to stock up on notebooks, pencils, and binders. Time to start figuring out new schedules, pick-ups, and after-school activities. Summer is over, the general messaging seems to go, as soon as August hits.
But before you dash to your local office store to get all the kids’ school supplies, slow down! Most American families have a couple weeks of summer left before school starts. You still have time to make memories, prepare for the upcoming year in an intentional, mindful way, and reflect on all you did together this summer.
You also have time to start thinking about back-to-school traditions you may want to start new, or reimagine. In his book The Intentional Family, marriage therapist and researcher William Doherty writes that until recently, most therapists emphasized the importance of talking, how couples and families spoke to each other and worked through their problems. “But as important as talking is,” Doherty continues, “what professionals weren’t considering was how we enact our family relationships.” Traditions are how families enact relationships. They are “repeated and coordinated activities that have significance for the family.” Families with strong traditions also tend to have greater cohesion and a better sense of family identity.
The end of summer and beginning of back-to-school preparation is a perfect occasion for some family traditions. You may already have one or several in place, and that’s awesome! If not, or if you’d like a fresh idea or two, below are some tips to get you started.
An end-of-summer trip.
Depending on your budget and time available (and recognizing the crazy world of pandemic travel), take some time to celebrate your summer with one final event together. If you can manage an actual, full-on family vacation, awesome! If not, check for last-minute deals on hotels in nearby cities. Or plan a day trip to a nearby hiking or swimming destination, museum or zoo, or something else your family enjoys together. The point is not how elaborate it is, but to close out the summer by doing something fun together. Even a nice dinner out is someplace to start. While you’re together, reflect on the summer. What worked well, and what didn’t? Are there things you want to make sure you do next summer? What are ways your family lived its values this summer?
A back-to-school countdown.
Make a paper chain, or print out giant calendar numbers and tape them on the wall, so you can celebrate the last days of summer and arrival of the school year each morning when you remove one link/number. If you’re extra motivated, brainstorm a list of fun activities, and write one on each day. Ideas might include visiting a pool or beach, going out for ice cream, making s’mores, or holding a neighborhood summer barbeque. This can also be the place to include school-supply or clothes shopping, or any last-minute physicals, eye exams, or other required appointments or paperwork.
Go to the library.
This one might sound crazy; aren’t we all supposed to be swimming and sunning in summer, not checking out books? But your local library can also help your family mentally prepare for the year to come. Talk to your kids about any back-to-school fears or challenges they might be facing. Perhaps you have a child headed for preschool—books on starting school are remarkably helpful in getting children excited instead of fearful. Or maybe you have an older child who has really been struggling with her temper lately—ask your librarian for suggestions on books that help with anger management in an age-appropriate way. Reading these together will help all of you start processing what’s to come, and brainstorm appropriate ways to handle some big emotions or fears. You can also do something a bit more lighthearted, and check out some kids cookbooks so your family can get new ideas for packed lunches or after-school snacks.
Customize something.
Let’s face it—even adults love to see their name on their stuff! Get your kids a customized water bottle, backpack, lunch bag, pencils, or something else. They can help you pick out the special item, or you can get it for them as a surprise gift. It’s fun, practical (maybe their stuff will stay out of the lost-and-found this year!), and helps them develop their own unique sense of identity.
Go on a date.
With your spouse. By yourselves. Hire a sitter, drop the kids off at Grandma’s, or pick up a frozen pizza if they’re old enough to be home alone. You and your partner deserve some time to celebrate your summer together, recharge, and maybe even start thinking through what you want out of the coming school year for your family.
Don’t let back-to-school sales or emails about what forms you need to have completed for school make you think summer is over. IT’S STILL SUMMER for a few more weeks! And there’s no time like the present to savor every moment and enjoy your remaining time together.
Traditions help your family develop its identity, celebrate accomplishments, and prepare for new seasons.
This year, don’t get caught in the rush. Instead, create some new back-to-school traditions that can anchor this season of your family’s life for years to come.