Whether you’re full of optimism or dread, one solution to making this school year count is to help your kids set their own back-to-school goals. We all know that goal-setting is important for adults: it is linked to greater self-confidence, autonomy, and motivation. For kids, the benefits of goal-setting are numerous. Working on their goals helps them to develop greater self-confidence and sense of self, and also improves their locus of control and strategic thinking and planning skills.

Decades of research into parenting have demonstrated that authoritative parents—versus authoritarian or permissive—end up raising the most successful children. Authoritative parents are those who set limits, but use lots of love, kindness, respect, warmth, and communication in upholding those limits. Children raised in authoritative homes tend to become more autonomous, self-reliant, self-disciplined, and academically and socially successful. They are taught to be in touch with their emotions, to have a healthy respect for natural boundaries, and to take charge of their own behavior. Perhaps the most well respected source on authoritative parenting is Positive Discipline, by Dr. Jane Nelsen.